What's wrong with this conversation? - Part 3

Over the last 2 weeks, I shared with you two sample conversation between a manager and an employee, highlighting the differences between a 'closed' and 'open' approach (the conversations are included below for any new readers since this week!).

The response from our community was insightful! One of our current IntelliCoach PRO course participants, Deepa, shared her perspective on the second conversation, describing it as "empowering for the employee" and emphasizing the trust and respect demonstrated by the manager. She also pointed out that the manager "doesn't step in to solve an issue, and leaves the door wide open for deeper collaboration."

Deepa's feedback is so spot on for me. By approaching discussions with curiosity, respect, and a willingness to collaborate, we create a stunningly different workplace atmosphere.

But there's something else.

Even the 'open' conversation example is not a template by any means. As Deepa noted, "in real life Managers will bring their own unique style to bear, and the contrast of the two conversations was super helpful." This highlights how we all 'bolt on' our style on the foundation of a strong, positive mindset.

Key takeaways from our conversation analysis:

1. Open-ended questions encourage deeper engagement and understanding.

2. A manager's mindset heavily influences the tone and outcome. (do you actually believe that the other person can figure things out or are you pretending?)

3. Empowering employees and trust leads to more productive collaboration.

4. Adapting our communication style to the individual is essential.

Thank you to everyone who participated in this little 3-week exercise.

Keep striving for that 1% improvement each day! 😊

❌ CONVERSATION 1:

Manager: "James, have you received the supplier evaluation report?"

James:"Yes."

Manager:"Have you already read it?"

James: "Yes, I have. It was quite complex."

Manager:"Ok. So have you understood the new evaluation matrix?"

James: "Yes, of course." (What else can he say...)

Manager: "Have you already thought about how to present it?"

James:"No, not yet."

Manager:"Can you squeeze that in somehow until our next 1:1 in a week?"

James: "Yes...sure."

Manager: "Glad to hear that. Then let's move on to the next topic."

Quite a few of you responded and noticed the obvious closed questions and apparent 'narrow' mindset of the Manager.

And yes, that's exactly what happened here. The Manager asks questions, but really does not learn *anything*. In the end, whether James is successful or not is more of a gamble.

✅ CONVERSATION 2:

Manager: "What's your opinion about it?"

James:"In my view, the overall matrix is useful, but the detailed rules are very complex."

Manager:"I see. What's your concern?"

James:"I wonder how our stakeholders will see it. I have doubts how helpful it is like this."

Manager:"Ok, I see where you are coming from. Hmm, given we have 2 weeks left still before we share it, what's your recommendation right now?"

James: "Well, while reading it, I had 2-3 ideas how to make it easier to understand. If I talk to them this week, turnaround could still be fast enough for us to fix it."

Manager: "Oh, that's excellent to hear. Do you foresee any obstacle or risk? And also, how else could I support, if any?"

James:"I am worried that they don't agree and block it. Would it possible for me to copy you, so you can send a reinforcing note on top of my email? I think this would be a clear signal that this is important."

Manager:"Yes, absolutely. Just tag me on teams on this. I am glad you brought it up. And for now, what else do we need to address around this?"

James:"I am good. This helped!"

Manager:"Ok, shall we move on to the next topic?"